Dalam kesenjaanmu yang bergentaran
Masih lagi kau melihat jelmaan itu
Sang suami yang memberantakkan
Jiwamu dan ikatan perkahwinanmu
Apa guna sesalan yang enggan padam?
Apa erti kerinduan yang tak pernah redam?
Dari segala yang engkau mahukan darinya
Takkan kau dapat walau seinci sehasta
Dia telah memilih suatu kehidupan yang berbeza
Dan engkau tertinggal terasing dalam duka
Dalam kesedihan yang menyesakkan
Tiada apa yang tersisa untukmu
Sang pengingkar itu takkan pulang
Dan kerinduanmu adalah suatu permainan usang
Yang takkan mampu engkau menang.
#822 Tentang Ulangtahun Umi Yang Ke-Tujuhpuluh
Umi
Dalam usia senjamu ini
Kami titipkan doa yang paling ikhlas
Semoga hari-harimu damai berseri
Dihias kenangan bahgia yang membekas
Tenang dalam tatangan Ilahi
Meski perjalananmu tak selalu indah
Terlalu banyak kepahitan yang menghujan
Dan kau terlalu sering merenang gundah
Namun, kau tetap cekal meniti kehidupan
Tetap dalam arah yang bertabah
Umi
Di kesenjangan antara mimpi dan realiti
Di sini kami berdiri
Keluargamu yang takkan jemu menjulang
Sayang kami pada ibunda seorang
Ratu hati kami
Umi yang terpaling kami kasihi.
#756 On Gifts From An Absent Father
You gave me this, Pa:
This burning fire unquenchable
This hopefulness improbable
These ramrod blinds unbendable
Your gifts to your eldest son:
Absence ineffable
Erasure irredeemable
Disappointment inconsolable
Should I thank you?
Can whispered grace amend these hurts?
Or does sin purge all goodness?
#707 On The Day of Your Funeral
I often think of the day
When they will tell me
That you have met your last
And I will pretend to be unsure
Whether to attend your funeral
(Of course I will)
And at your open grave
I will resist the temptation
To hurl one final curse
For all that you did not do
Instead, I will pretend to pray
For your soul that will burn in Hell.
#674 On This Red Line
This is where the line is drawn
Marked out here in crimson blaze
No white knight, no foolish pawn
I refuse your hollow praise
Go on, glance with murd’rous bile
My own stillness spurns your guile.
#667 On Little Minds
She frowned, then eyes a-widened
And whispered loudly this:
“I have to ask the husband, right?”
A child’s mind - ah, what bliss!
She begged with charm implicit
Implored with heart o’erwrought
“You’ll come today to visit, right?”
Her pleading came to naught.
#661 Tentang Kebebasan Seorang Anak
Aku tak lagi
Perlu menunduk akur -
Bebas berlari!
#653 Tentang Mimpi Beracu Tinju (Abang Ijan)
Di bawah langit murka
Dentuman guntur dan deruman gerabak
Bersilih ganti bersaling gema
Kau dan aku, mata merah marak
Terjebak dalam kancah amarah
Mengacu tinju bersahut galak
Abang Ijan,
Apa makna mimpi bermusuh
Tali akrab terlerai lusuh?
#623 On Walking Away From The Maimed
Just watch me walking away
Riding off into my own private sunset
Alone, but unhurt
I sought my own refuge
From your games
And here I am
Intact and ungrateful
- or so you would say
I refuse to be one of the maimed
And those who have remained
They will bear their own scars, in time
Goodbye.
I have no more tears left to cry.
#607 On Being a Good Boy
All I wanted was to be a good boy;
A good boy who would not disappoint you, and make
You proud. My being would wipe away your tears.
I would tiptoe around the eggshells of my toys
And your feelings: mercurial, volatile. I would rake
Away your hurts, and transmute them into my own fears.